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I like to read food books. Here is my online Library

Wot I is reading now:

  • The River Cottage Fish Book

    The River Cottage Fish Book by Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall

  • The Devil in the Kitchen: The Autobiography

    The Devil in the Kitchen: The Autobiography by Marco Pierre White

  • Curry: A Tale of Cooks and Conquerors

    Curry: A Tale of Cooks and Conquerors by Lizzie Collingham

  • Smoked Beers: History, Brewing Techniques, Recipes (Classic Beer Style)

    Smoked Beers: History, Brewing Techniques, Recipes (Classic Beer Style) by Ray Daniels

  • Vittoria Colonna and the Spiritual Poetics of the Italian Reformation (Catholic Christendom, 1300-1700)

    Vittoria Colonna and the Spiritual Poetics of the Italian Reformation (Catholic Christendom, 1300-1700) by Abigail Brundin

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Help!!! ….. Needed

Does anyone out there know of anyone who wants some temporary work in the two weeks prior to Christmas?

They’ll be working alongside me and be paid at least £6.50. We may even throw in some free lunch too.

They must be capable of doing some heavy lifting and happy to do a lot of cleaning. If any Cambridge residents are reading this then please ask around. If I get a successful candidate recommended through the blog, the blog reader will get some smoked goodies as a prize. Does that make sense?

There is this thing called the internet…

and you can like put stuff on it, like pages and stuff…….

So, nearly three years into the job and we now have a (temporary) website for River Farm Smokery.

If you need to you can find it here. It’s basic and gives not a great deal of info away but it’ll do for now. They nicked my pics too. All for the cause I suppose.

Talking to people; in the flesh.

Yes, I may not type much stuff on my computer these days but I do occasionally talk to people and last week I spoke to nigh on 40 of them.

First, in what was a charged and emotive meeting of Linton’s WI in the village hall, I talked at length about the River Farm Smokery, the food we produce there, and why the good ladies of the WI should choose to shop with us.

This is the 3rd WI talk I have given and I have dreaded each one. Not least because I am an innate pessimist. Though they are quite nice to do. The hosts are, inevitably, polite, attentive when not asleep, and often ask difficult questions at the end of it all. A good thing. A small handful of the audience look none the wiser at the end of my talks but I’m sure that is true for all people who talk in public.

It is almost certainly true for the lecturers at top university, the University of Cambridge, from where an unwieldy gaggle of first year architecture students came on Thursday to learn how not to build a smokery. Their teacher has set them a project to design a smokery and shop and I gave them a tour and tried to impress upon them that, like hip-hop, the flow is key in the smoking game.

Come on kids lets see those plans.

Christmas at River Farm Smokery

Rashly, I handed out some of my dog-eared Moo cards last night whilst picking up #1 from a halloween party. So I thought I had better post to say that I am still here and that at some point www.riverfarmsmokery.co.uk will be over there.

In the meantime, if you want some good smoked stuff for Christmas then do one of these things:
+ Send me a mail
+ Go here: Local Flavour
+ Come up to the shop (Mon-Sat 10-5:30) which is here.
+ Ring us on 01223 811382

Also, we are now selling our produce at Cambridge Farmers Outlet. Which is nice.

Next, keep your eyes out for a “symphony of duck”.

An upgrade to

WordPress 2.6

but will I actually use it????

Credit Crunch? What Credit Crunch?

This blog comes out of semi-retirement to bring a full scale assault on the credit crunch - in the form of a dinner for two of the tasting menu at the two Michelin starred Midsummer House with one flight of wines.

I’ve been living in Cambridge for 10 years or so and I am so happy that I have finally made it to Midsummer House. I’ve been geeking over food for longer than that and I can finally say that I have eaten at a Michelin starred restaurant.

And the verdict is: yeah baby!

As I think I’ve said before, I have eaten in very few good restaurants in my lifetime. So, when we plunged, both feet first, into a three and a half hour meal at Midsummer House I had little to compare it to. It was always going to be one of the best meals I have eaten.

Here is an over long run through the menu. Those with (a) a life or (b) some perspective or (c) wanting a proper restaurant review may want to leave now…..

Prior to the 11/12 course tasting menu we were presented with some home made crisps with a balsamic ‘foam’ (more like a balsamic cream). Wonderful with the crisps - giving them a super posh salt n vinegar flavour. Also, a small pan of cheese scones. Lovely, but would have worked much better next door at the Fort St George with a pint.

Then………

Grapefruit and Champagne Foam
A small pedestal was placed next to our table and one of the multitude of French waiting staff placed two empty glasses on it. Foam wassquirted from a soda syphon into each glass. We were given small silver spoons to eat it with. My glass, I think, was too warm and the foam ‘melted’ quite quickly. But as a palate cleanser it was a good start.

We all know foams are old hat but we had people squirting great fluid for us. The game had begun.

Tiger Prawn, Cucumber and Cauliflower
According to the menu, this was the actual first course and was simply delicious. Again a glass, with shredded lettuce, cubes of cucumber, cubes of langoustine jelly (I couldn’t taste what they were but Dr B could), and tiny florets of pickled cauliflower all covered with a cauliflower veloute - the tiger prawns swimming somewhere in the middle.

Truly stupendous. Shades of prawn cocktail. Deconstrucing things I noted: Langoustine jelly nodded towards:

Langoustine and King Crab
One langoustine coated in sesame seeds. A rectangle of black sesame paste on the plate. With a king crab tortelloni on a swede puree and julienned (almost vermicilli-like) swede on top. Bits of this were fantastic. Visually spectacular.

The langoustine was perfectly cooked though I think the sesame seeds were a little oily and not crunchy enough. The swede puree was too strong with a sharp balsamic(?) tang to it. The swede julienne and the tortelloni were wonderful. The king crab was almost egg-like in its softness.

Piquillo Pepper Cannelloni
The first cannelloni tonight and the first of three times they used what I’ll describe as ‘crispy shell’.

Visually this also was a real treat. A rectangular stone plate with a groove cut down one side in which lay a red cylindrical lollipop with a wooden lollipop stick. A small pond in the middle of the plate contained a vivid red dipping sauce with tiny pieces of green chilli and two small cubes of Jamaican pepper jelly.

The thin, sweet, pepper-red crispy shell of the lollipop gave way to a rich chicken liver mousse. Dipped in the sauce added another layer of sweetness. Gorgeous.

We were firmly ensconsed in gastro heaven at this point.

Sauteed scallop, Bay Leaf, Pigs Trotter
The last of a wonderful opening salvo of dishes. Any of these first four are contenders for best dish of the evening.

A huge super salty/caramelised crusty scallop; sweet with the savoury flavour of the bay leaf. The best scallop I have ever eaten. Set on a plate with a stroke of sweet shallot puree, tiny onion rings, a dot of apple caramel and small crunchy trotter croquettes. The trotter, I thought, was a little too dry. But that’s like complaining about the sound of the hi-hat on Black Cow. Isn’t it?

English Asparagus, Spring Truffle
Looks pretty - tastes ok. Overall, not a great dish we agree. An asparagus puree (too salty) with asparagus cannelloni (crispy potato shell, asparagus filling) with two small asparagus tips on top. A slice of truffle on top of it all.

If I can’t taste something there is no guarantee that it doesn’t taste of anything. My sense of taste is not great. But Dr B agreed the spring truffle didn’t really taste of much. And isn’t the English asparagus season over?

Never mind. The wine is good. The service is good. Everything is good. I feel better than James Brown.

Roast Zander, Red Wine and Nettles
Beautifully cooked with with a very salty crunchy skin and soft white fish underneath. Almost cod like in texture but a different flavour. Never had Zander before.

Served with a Pinot Noir and a red wine sauce, this dish had an almost Autumnal feel to it. Large pieces of shallot (or silverskin onions) and a small mound of spinach (not nettles) under which lurked…….

BINGO! BANGO!

Smoked Eel from River Farm Smokery!

So here I was spending a large chunk of the kids’ inheritance in a 2 starred Michelin restaurant eating my smoked eel! Like wowsa man. This is like, just so… I mean. Like - wow!

That said, they were tiny wee pieces and tasted quite different to how it normally tastes. But it tasted good. Lord knows what thay had done to it.

Anyway, quite a heavy complicated dish. Too much going on for me. Not sure nettles are very seasonal at the moment. Beginning to feel a little full. This was big enough to be a main course.

Just a little

Pousse cafe
next. A variation on egg-nog. A super sweet maple syrup with a raw egg on top and a creamy/foam on top of that. With a grating of nutmeg and some spring onion. The maple syrup completely swamped the flavour of the rest. And despite it being in the bottom of the glass you ended up with more of that than anything else.

Still, I managed to squeeze two of them down.

Bourbon Smoked Pigeon, Iceberg Lettuce, Sweet Potato
Slow Roast Saddle of Lamb, Broccoli Puree, Artichokes, Tomato, Lovage
We were informed that they had run out of pigeon and that it would be replaced by the lamb. I regret this slightly as the lamb dish was, like the Zander, a large unwieldy thing that didn’t really work well for me.

The saddle was lovely though: pink, juicy, succulent. There was a confit shoulder - pressed and fried to gain another lovely salty crust. But, like the trotter, it was too dry. The confit tomato was good but the butter(?) beans, artichokes, and brocolli puree all had that slightly mealy dry texture to them.

I begin to pespire and remove my jacket. I finish off my 7th glass of wine of the evening.

At least the heavy stuff is over and we’re on to desert now. There is a slight pause whilst we wait for our puddings and I tremble as I see the size of deserts going to the next table.

To be honest, I was half expecting to be hungry when I left. I assumed that we would be presented with ‘tastes’ of dishes for a tasting menu but the last two dishes were pretty well full-size portions. And now we’re going in for three deserts and they don’t look small. Oh lordy.

A sip of water. Another lengthening of the belt in time for:

Camomile, Lemon and Ginger
This was great. Three layers in a glass. Refreshing, zingy lemon foamy/syllabub on top, a thin ginger jelly in the middle and a camomile….erm….cream(?) at the bottom. Almost like a selection of herbal teas made into a luxurious creamy desert. But better.

But wayyy too small. I mean this was tasting size. What we want is BIG puddings. Something like:

Coffee Chocolate and Passion Fruit
Which could have been a drop of coffee, a piece of chocolate and a few passion fruit seeds but was in fact:

A scoop of passion fruit ice cream on some freeze-dried cocoa (or was it coffee?), a chocolate mousse with some freeze dried passion fruit in a coffee flavoured ‘crunchy shell’. An egg white kind of like an uncooked meringue (I’ve had this before in Lisbon - no idea what it is called) dusted with coffee/cocoa and with more freeze dried passion fruit.

Phew. We’re struggling here. We’re looking to rent some spare intestinal storage.

Luckily there’s only one course to go.

At a place like this, there is no point finishing on half measures. So,

Marinated Strawberries, Basil Bavarois
appears like some kind of scale model set from Lost in Space. Basil and strawberry scented dry-ice rises up and around a basil bavarois tetrahedron faced with strawberry ‘cruchy shell’, a scoop of strawberry ice cream rests on gravel-like freeze dried strawberry, the marinated strawberries draped with basil leaves, and a basil madeleine hunts for room on the plate.

Truly “vicissitudes of life had become indifferent to me, its disasters innocuous, its brevity illusory”.

It could have been a great finish. It almost was. But the strawberries weren’t all that and the freeze dried ones were superfluous. Great bavarois though. And great presentation.

And so, as we sat back and waited until the food had moved far enough into to us to allow us to speak, we marvelled at the evening: the food, the wine, the 3 and a half hours that had passed, the chef who had been carried past the window and thrown into the Cam. Truly a great great meal.

I of course thought a little coffee would be good. A little espresso. To top me up. But coffee doesn’t come alone. Oh no. Why would you want to have your coffee without

a mound of sugar coated french pastries accompanied by a bowl of prune compote and a bowl of creme anglais? Why indeed?

So, whilst contemplating every gluttons unanswerable question - can I ever be full? - the chocolates arrived in a large wooden box. I didn’t need them. I didn’t really want them. To be totally honest they didn’t look that good. But someone had worked hard to make them, hadn’t they? They put their heart and soul into them so that we, the punters, would end this epic meal on a high note. It was only polite to say yes.

And what did I choose? One caramel. One rum and raisin. One curry.

‘Pah! Curry chocolate.’ you say! And so you may. But, remember where we are. Count those stars. Remember that I am a veteran of Artisan Du Chocolate - the kings and queens of unusual chocolate flavours. Put your mind at rest. It’s going to be unusual maybe but trust us here. We’re in safe hands.

And that is what I did. I put my trust in those skilled chefs. So that when I bit into that white chocolate shaped like a bell and filled with a curried fondant, I laughed out loud.

I laughed loudly because at the very end - after a veritable mountain of food, two michelin stars, 10 or so (small) glasses of wine, wonderful service, a warm and lively atmosphere - at the end of this gastronomic journey they presented me with something to remember for a long long time. The madeleine may disappear to a dusty corner of my memory but that chocolate will remain forever.

And I’ll remember it for being the only thing I couldn’t bring myself to finish that night.

It plays hideous tricks on the brain

We are led to believe that trunk-thighed, gusset-showing, cockerney-landlady of global pop Madge Madonna enjoyed one of our loverly smoked mackerel last night.

This is good because:
(a) we could maybe leverage some celebrity endorsement of River Farm Smokery smoked mackerel.
(b) when I was 13 I had posters of madonna on my wall. I am now feeding her. But not in the same way that I wanted to when I was 13.
(c) I actually have something to blog about.

This is bad because:
(a) Like ready meals, celebrity culture is of course killing us all.
(b) Who cares?
(c) The new album ain’t much cop
(d) Donald Fagen and Walter Becker have yet to eat any of my smoked goods.

Right, that’ll do for the next 3 months.

Real Food Festival - I Came, I Saw, etc.

I’ll keep it brief because (a) I am very bad at forming an opinion and holding it until the end of a post (b) I’m tired and I need to go and pack (c) I’m not sure that you are really that interested.

By the time I got there I wanted to sit down and sleep, I didn’t want to eat anything. I had, after all lunched on “Grilled duck hearts and livers, big chips, Béarnaise sauce“. More on that later though.

There was a lot to try and a lot of producers I hadn’t seen before. Along with Ummera, there were two Irish smokeries I hadn’t heard of before as well as one from Orkney. I had a good chat with Anthony - Hello Anthony - and tasted his obviously very inferior smoked salmon (ahem - cough).

I also met this chap who appears to have some uber-smokery in Sussex, smoking Maldon sea salt, and spices for all manner of big companies. An ex EHO too. He had some good looking smoked garlic on his stand along with smoked potatoes.

I won’t go on to list everything else I tasted as that would be tiresome for the few of you who have made this far. I would just like to talk fudge though.

I’m not a food show veteran. I’ve been to ten or so. All of them have fudge. Lots of it. Stall after stall of fudge. Fudge is almost as omnipresent as chutney, but chutney has a purpose. Fudge? I can’t see the point. I mean it’s easy to make and it probably lasts a long time but … I mean who needs it? Do you ever crave the fudge? Nope, me neither. Fudge off! Even Real fudge can fudge off.

The debate advertised as “IS CHEAP FOOD COSTING THE EARTH?” was really a rather rambling general discussion on food ‘chaired’ by that chap off the telly who cried before a cow was killed on Full on Food (geddit?).

This was a missed opportunity. Tim Lang is a food politics heavyweight and getting him and Mark Price of Waitrose was a coup. There were a lot of people in the audience who wanted to be heard though few of them were given a real opportunity. Next time lets have a couple of hours and a chair who has some kind of clue.

Oh and who thought getting Trudie Styler in was a good idea?

Lunch in London and the Real Food Festival

As I said previously, I’ll be in London today for the Real Food Festival and lunch at Bord-eaux at the Grosvenor House Hotel (Park Lane).

I’m lunching alone, which I am never that keen on so if anyone would like to join me then let me know.

On The Road

Thursday finds me departing River Farm Smokery HQ for the even smokier Lahndan Town - dahn sarf. Cor blimey wot a pea soupah. etc.

Under managament’s instruction I am being despatched to the Real Food Festival.

As I understand it, this is a festival of Real food. Not just a food festival but a Real food festival. So, nothing masquerading as food just actual Real food.

I ahve little experience of this Real food and I am worried that I may return having learned that what I have been eating for the last 30 odd years of my life was not actually real. Maybe I have grown to this age and size consuming pretend food. Built from faux food. What could that have done to me? What would I be like now if I had only eaten Real food?

[shudder] Doesn’t bear thinking about.

Anyway, I’m going. Not entirely sure why. But I am. I will get to meet the enemy*. Maybe I could sabotage their stand. And obviously I will tip my boater to the bhajiman. Also, Tim Lang is taking part in a (real?) food debate going on later in the day. That should be good.

More excitingly I am going to a fancy new Lahndahn Tahn restaurant by the name of Bord’eaux (those of you who dislike flash do not click on that link). Where top chef Ollie Couillaud is using River Farm Smokery smoked salmon to entice punters to his gaff. What is enticing me is “Grilled duck hearts and livers, big chips, Béarnaise sauce“. [drool]

All this and I get to spend a fair part of my day with Andrew from Eating Albion. Which is good.

That said, I’ve never met the guy. He could be awful ;)

Oh and if anyone else reading this is gonna be there and would like to hook up for some glutenfreefairtradedecaffinated Real tea, then drop me a line.

Oh, and if you want to go but think it is too expensive then go and see the Ummera blog for details on how to get a reduction on your ticket price.

[* - Just joking there Anthony]